RESOURCES

DATING AND RELATIONSHIPS

ARTICLES 

• How to Flirt, According to Science

• If Connection is Our Core Human Need Then Why Are We So Bad At It? 

• Heartalytics Blog

• Do Men and Women Grieve Differently?

• What is Love Bombing?

BOOKS

• If the Buddha Dated: A Handbook for Finding Love on a Spiritual Path by Charlotte Kasl

• Getting Naked: Five Steps to Finding the Love of Your Life (While Fully Clothed and Totally Sober) by Harlan Cohen

• Helen Fischer: Why Him, Why Her?

• Your Brain on Love by Stan Tatkin 

• Wired for Love by Stan Tatkin

• Attached: The Science of Adult Attachment by Amir Levine ​

• True Love by Thich Nhat Hanh

• ​Calling in the One by Katherine Woodward Thomas

QUIZZES

• Diane Poole Heller's attachment style assessment

• More In depth Attachment Quiz

• Values Survey

• Helen Fisher, What's your Type?

• 5 Languages of Love: What's Your Love Language?

E-COURSES

• The Attachment Project with Dan Brown - Test + E-course

• Dan Siegel and Lisa Firestone on Rewriting your Attachment Story

• Developing Secure Attachment

PODCASTS

• Dateable

• Modern Love

• Love With Integrity: How To Manage Relationship Anxiety

MINDFULNESS + MEDITATION

CUSHIONS

• Brentwood Home

• Sitting Matters

• Project Full 

MEETINGS

• Young Urban Zen (age 25-35) at SF Zen Center

• SF Dharma Collective 

• Meditation Meetings Insight SF

• 8 week Mindful Self Compassion with Lea Seigen-Shinraku

• 8 week Mindful Self Compassion with Ashley Crouch 

CLASSES

• Within Meditation

• Anchor Meditation

• Mindful Self-Compassion Courses 

• Radical Compassion Handouts & Resources

• ​UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center

• About Tonglen Heart Meditation​

• Free Guided Meditations

APPS

• Calm

• Headspace

• Insight Timer

• Journey Meditation

• Oak Meditation + Breathing

• Liberate Meditation

FOR COUPLES

COURSES + RESOURCES

• Prepare-Enrich Premarital Counseling
• Gottman Institute

​BOOKS

• ​Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson
• Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch
• ACT with Love by Russ Harris, MD
• Wired for Love by Stan Tatkin
• Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel
• The State of Affairs by Esther Perel
• The Mindful Relationship by Lauren Korshak
• Conscious Uncoupling by Katherine Woodward Thomas

PODCASTS

• Where Should We Begin? by Esther Perel​

ANTIRACISM
 

BOOKS

• Me and White Supremacy by Layla Saad
• How to be an Anti-Racist by Ibram X. Kendi
• White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo

RESOURCES

• ​Writing Prompts to Use if You've been Accused of White Fragility - by Leesa Renee Hall
• Dive In Well- an organization supporting diversity in wellness
• Video explaining White Fragility
• Eddie Moore's 21 Day Racial Equity Habit Building Challenge 

ORGANIZATIONS

• Surge Institute - Oakland based
• ​Center for Policing Equity - Data Science for justice that measures bias in policing 
• Open Justice Initiative - help shape the law in service of justice
• Equal Justice Initiative 
• ​Black Lives Matter
• Live Free USA
• Adopt-A-State - help save votes in a key battleground state

PSYCHOLOGY, COMMUNICATION + EMOTIONS

PSYCHIATRY

• Cerebral - in network psychiatry

APPS

• MoodNotes "Dental Floss for your mind" (for identifying cognitive distortions)

• Mentegram for tracking your mental health

RESOURCES

• Zephyr Wellness & The Mental Matters Podcast

• Identifying Emotions with the Zephyr Wellness

PODCASTS

• Brene Brown podcast​

BOOKS 

• Non Violent Communication

• An extended introduction to Non Violent Communication (NVC)

• Get out of your Mind and Into Your Life by Stephen Hayes

• Crucial Conversations by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler, Stephen R. Covey 

• The Art of Listening

• Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone and Bruce Patton

FOR MEN

ARTICLES

• Do Men and Women Grieve Differently?

MOVIE + RESOURCES

• The Mask You Live In

• Men's Collective Meet Up or Facebook

• The Art of Manliness 

• ​The Mankind Project

• John Wineland Coaching and Retreats

GROUPS

• San Francisco Men's Groups with Rob Schene

• East Bay Men's Groups with Alexander Warnaw

• IRL Men's Groups 

BOOKS

• The Last American Man​ by Elizabeth Gilbert

FOR WOMEN

BOOKS

• Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkole Estes

MOVIES

• Miss Representation

WEBSITES & PODCASTS

• Sistership Circle

MAKING PEACE WITH FOOD

BOOKS

• Stop Bingeing, Start Living! by Shrein Bahremi
• Within by Habib Sadeghi
• Intuitive Eating by Elyse Resch and Evelyn Tribole
• Eating in the Light of the Moon by Anita Johnston, PhD.
• Women, Food, and God by Geneen Roth

GROUPS/ OUTPATIENT THERAPY

• Evolve Wellness
• Kindful Body Online Eating Disorder Treatment
• Eating Disorders Anonymous: Find a Support Group
• Recovery Warriors: Find treatment centers, Podcasts, Resource
• Rise Up + Recover – App
• The Body Positive 
• Free Eating Disorder Support Groups
• Woodleaf Adult Professional IOP program
• Online IOP: Brightheart Health
• APTED-SF: A non-profit resource network of ED resources
• ANAD: http://www.anad.org/
• Online Mentor Support Community
• About-Face

VIDEOS + Online Courses

• Educational videos
• Geneen Roth Courses

PERSONAL GROWTH TOOLS

COACHING + PODCASTS

• The Art of the Feminine - coaching, podcasts, and more with Shannon Port 
• COACH: Energy Psychology & Infinite Possibilities: Adriana Popescu

BOOKS​

• The Core by Michael Assedo
• Radical Forgiveness by Colin Tipping

• Creating Community: A book by Charlotte Kasl

​
TOOLS
Heart Math Free Tools

ENERGY WORK 

• What is Polarity Therapy? Polarity Healing Arts
• The International Center for Reiki Training
  

SOMATICS

• The Focusing Institute

• Authentic Movement

• CIIS Somatic Psychology Program

• Rosen Method

• Body-Mind Centering

AGING

BOOKS

• Still Here by Ram Dass

• Being Mortal by Atul Gawande

• The Second Half of Life by Angeles Arrien

• No Time to Spare by Ursula K. Le Guin

GRIEF, LOSS AND DIFFICULT TIMES

BOOKS

• ​Healing into Life and Death by Stephen Levine (meditations)

• Broken Open by Elizabeth Lesser

• The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion​

​
​WEBSITE

• Stephen Jenkinson, Orphan Wisdom 

• Grief.com

ADDICTION

SPECIALISTS

• ​Erica Spartos Life Circle Recovery

• Foundations San Francisco IOP

• The Center for Harm Reduction Therapy: harmreductiontherapy.org

​
MEETINGS

• Find an AA Meeting in San Francisco or Marin

• Smart Recovery

• Access Institute

• Refuge Recovery, A Buddhist Approach to Recovery

TEENS

SUPPORT CENTERS

• Coyote Coast Youth and Family Services

• Muir Woods Residential & IOP Treatment Marin

• Talkline Family Support Center in San Francisco

• Comprehensive List of Support Services in San Francisco for Children and Families, published by Support for Families of Children with Disabilities

LECTURE

• ​The Teenage Brain by Dr. Dan Siegel

​
​BOOK

• Transforming Stress for Teens

ADDITIONAL WELLNESS RESOURCES

MEDITATION CLASSES

• Online free MSC classes

• Metta Date free meditation class (Fridays at 5:30)

• Kind Mind Meditation Gatherings Tuesdays at 5 PM PST with Michael Todd Fink

• Mind Oasis Free Streaming Meditation

• Mindful Schools is offering online mindful classes for kids (T/W/Th.)

• Insight Timer App

• Journey Meditation App

• Pause Mindfulness App

• Within Meditation is offering online classes

• Teacher and author Tara Brach has offerings on her website.​​

• Cello Meditation Concert at AirBnB experiences

• Audio Dharma meditation app from Insight Redwood City

• SF Dharma Collective daily meditation classes and workshops

• Big Heart City in San Francisco (Friday night sits)

WELLNESS RESOURCES

• Buy a Reusable Mask, Donate a Reusable Mask​

• Inclusive Diop Masks that support Detroit organizations (More info)

• Dive In Well- an organization supporting diversity in wellness

• Ethel's Club - an online membership club to support people of color in thriving

• Eddie Moore's 21 Day Racial Equity Habit Building Challenge 

• Justice in June Social Justice Calendar

• ​Writing Prompts to Use if You've been Accused of White Fragility - by Leesa Renee Hall

• Coping Calendar 

• Daily Breathwork Classes at Chorus

• SF Gyrokinesis Classes 

• Atlas of Emotions project - commissioned by the Dalai Lama

• Self-Care Physical Therapy classes with Ericka Merritt

• Yin Yoga on Sundays with Monique Haan

• Chi TV: Daily Live Chi Gong​

• Reusable Masks

• Buy or donate non-medical grade masks

• Netflix Party - watch Netflix remotely with friends

• The Get Down livestream dance party​​

• Qi Gong and Yoga Fusion Classes

• Community singing Series because singing releases endorphins

• AirBnB experiences

• Teleportation via Globe Genie 

• Air pano - virtual travel

• Live stream the Northern Lights:

• Yale's most popular online course: The Science of Well Being

• FREE Grief Support group with Yael Melamed 

• Physical Therapy Videos on Ergonomics with Marci Silverberg

• Reduced fee inclusive therapy

• Open Path Collective offers sessions from $30-$80 for those in need

MENTAL HEALTH RESOURCES

• Free and Low Fee Mental Health Services

JOB RESOURCES

• myanita.io - an app that helps you document and timestamp instances of workplace injustice 

• EEOC - U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

• Candor.co - Layoffs, hiring freezes, and support for those working in the tech industry

• Zoom Tips for Highly Sensitive People - tips for self-care and fighting Zoom exhaustion

LOCAL + NATIONAL ORGANIZATIONS FOR RACIAL EQUALITY

• Resources for combating Anti-Asian violence

• Surge Institute - Oakland based

• Center for Policing Equity - Data Science for justice that measures bias in policing 

• Open Justice Initiative - help shape the law in service of justice

• Equal Justice Initiative 

• Black Lives Matter

• Live Free USA

• Adopt-A-State - help save votes in a key battleground state

• Black Men Matter - mental health resources for black men

ENVIRONMENTAL RESOURCES + ORGANIZATIONS

• Rewilding Scotland

ARTICLES + PODCASTS

• That Discomfort Your Feeling Is Grief

• Brene Brown podcast on grief with David Kessler

• Cute Penguins video

• AFT Mental Health Articles and Resources for COVID-19​

• UCSF Tips and Resources

• The Science of Love and Attachment

EATING DISORDER SUPPORT

• @covid19eatingsupport for 24-7 meal support with dietitians

• Kindful Body Mondays at noon eating disorder support group

• Evolve Group Therapy

TIPS FOR TOUGH TIMES

A few tips that I've found to be helpful during difficult times: 

• Identify your feelings at any given moment: Grief, fear, anxiety, sadness, hope

• Take each day one step at a time. The future is uncertain, so do what you can for today. Keep reminding yourself "One step at a time." 

• Accept and respect your feelings (Remember: Feelings are uncomfortable sometimes, but discomfort = growth! Also, feelings pass if we give them the space to do so)

• Allow yourself to talk about uncomfortable subjects and feelings that you wouldn't have previously shared - let this be an experiment and see how it works out. New situations demand new coping skills and adaptations. 

• Attune to your needs moment by moment: Ask yourself "What do I need right now, in this moment?"

• Focus on prioritizing what you can control, i.e. thinking about your strengths, your attitude, actions, and day, and letting go of what you can't change, i.e. the economy, your plans for next month. 

• Practice generosity. When people snap at you, or seem to be making your life hard, make it a practice to remember everyone is struggling and to assume an attitude of patience and a reframing that the person may have good intentions.

• "Tend and Befriend." - Reach out to friends, loved ones, and community and let them support you. Reach out to a therapist if that's available to you. Tending and befriending is a helpful way to work through feelings of trauma. 

• "Name it to tame it." - Practice naming your feelings, good and bad. "Oh, I'm feeling shame" or "fear" or "anger." Use a feelings wheel if you're having trouble identifying what you're feeling. 

• Put things on your calendar to look forward to - volunteering, time in nature, dance parties, catch-up calls...

• Create daily or weekly rituals at the same time or place to create some sense of stability and peace of mind - meditation or a bike ride at the end of your work day, a weekly Sunday dinner with family. 

• Practice reframing: look for ways to change stressful thoughts into more hopeful stories for yourself

• Find creative ways to express yourself - Nurture your creativity through art, music, cooking, writing, or whatever mediums speak to you. Let creativity guide you in making and finding meaning, an important aspect of integrating and dealing with traumatic life events.

• Learn something new - Take the time to do an online course or read a book you've been meaning to

• Cultivate compassion for others (actively practicing lovingkindness or prayer can help)

• Reach out to others - to offer support and talk about how you feel 

• Stay connected - check In with friends, family, and neighbors

• If you're isolated, ask a friend to cowork remotely, host a remote gathering, or eat meals remotely

• Find different ways to move your body. It's tempting to just walk or run in every free moment. Try a new movement class, biking, swimming, or a new sport that could be available to you in your home or outdoors (see resources above). 

• Make ergonomic adjustments to your workplace - alternate sitting and standing and take movement or dance breaks between meetings, calls, or computer sessions.

• Use this time to identify your core values and act from them. Start devoting time, energy, and structure to what you value, whether that is a healthy lifestyle, or creativity, business, or relationships. Ask yourself how you can show up in the world that you will feel good about.

• Use a tracking tool to support your focus and forward motion towards something you value, so you can feel like you're engaged in something meaningful. For example, this tool for building racial equity. 

• Remember you are not alone. There is a common humanity here. Whatever you are feeling, someone else is feeling it. Just to help you feel more validated....Everyone is struggling right now with one of the following: relationship stress, parenting overload, trauma, financial anxiety, workplace stress, housing stress, or job insecurity. 

• Give, or donate, if you can (Research shows that giving activates the pleasure centers in our brain and helps us feel more well-being). Here's a good list of places you can donate to.